Jennifer Lopez has broken her silence on splitting with Ben Affleck following just two years of marriage and their second attempt at making things work after first parting ways back in 2004.
via: Radar Online
RadarOnline.com can reveal the singer confessed her marriage ending after two years has been "sad" and "scary".
J Lo, 55, marked her new chapter with a spicy cover story in Interview magazine in which she declared she won't be dipping her toes back into the dating pool for awhile.
The 55-year-old didn't shy from her less-than-perfect summer, which included a canceled tour and an onslaught of divorce rumors before she split from the Gone Girl actor.
In her cover story for Interview Magazine, the Jenny From the Block opened up to comedian Nikki Glaser about how dramatically her life changed in a matter of months.
While discussing her documentary, The Greatest Love Story Never Told, which she worked on with Affleck, Glaser asked J Lo about film's overall theme of self-love and re-examining one's life choices.
The comedian asked: "How do you examine what you did wrong without falling into a 'what’s wrong with you'?"
J Lo chucked as she replied: "The work is figuring yourself out. It's looking back at the feelings underneath and the belief systems that we have about ourselves that make us make certain choices and create certain patterns in our life.
"And so, when you get to a point where you think that you've learned the lessons, and then it blows up in your face again, you realize, 'Okay, I haven't, so what is it that I need to look at right now?' I would say, never stop looking inward, because it's so easy to blame everybody else."
The 55-year-old added: "But you have to be healthy. You have to be complete, if you want something that’s more complete.
"You have to be good on your own.
"I thought I learned that, but I didn't. And then, this summer, I had to be like, 'I need to go off and be on my own. I want to prove to myself that I can do that.'"
When Glaser asked if her summer of self discovery was hard, J Lo enthusiastically quipped back: "Yes, it's f---ing hard!"
She explained: "It feels lonely, unfamiliar, scary. It feels sad. It feels desperate.
"But when you sit in those feelings and go, 'These things are not going to kill me,' it's like actually, I am capable of joy and happiness all by myself."
J Lo made a point to note: "Being in a relationship doesn't define me.
"I can't be looking for happiness in other people. I have to have happiness within myself. I used to say I'm a happy person, but was still looking for something for somebody else to fill, and it’s just like, 'No, I’m actually good.'"
Later, J Lo admitted despite the work she's done to look inward and figure out what she wants in a partner, she isn't on the hunt for a new man – and won't be for some time.
She candidly said: "Here’s the thing: There's no new bar because I’m not looking for anybody."
As RadarOnline.com reported, J Lo filed for divorce from Affleck on August 20 in Los Angeles. She listed the couple's official separation date as April 26, 2024.
She also addressed the hurtful comments on social media where people were blaming her for the demise of her marriage.
Lopez said that because she has been in the spotlight for so long, however, she has learned how to shut out the noise.
'I know that everything that's being written and said about me, and all the conjecture of who I am as a person, is not who I am. I learned that a long time ago,' she said in the interview, which was conducted with Glaser back in September.
'And social media, because it came along after I had been in the public eye for a while, I don't take it as seriously as everybody else,' she explained.
'I know I'm a good person. I know I'm a good mom. I know who my friends are. I know my friends know who I am, my mom, my dad, all that stuff,' she added.
The Atlas actress said that in order to 'have a long career' in the entertainment industry, she has had to 'learn how to deal with that part of the business.'
'Some people are going to love you and some are not going to understand you, and some people just want to hate you to hate you, and none of that really matters,' she said.
'What matters for me, as an artist, is doing work that inspires me and that I enjoy doing, whether it's a huge commercial success or something that only touches one person that nobody ever f***ing even sees.'
She added: 'This is my life's passion. I love to sing. I love to dance. I love to act. I love to entertain. I love to create.'
In spite of it all, however, she said that it is still hard to 'see something that's hurtful.'
'Please don't get me wrong,' she said. 'I'm not Teflon.'
At another point in the conversation, she spoke again about dealing with haters who spread negativity online.
'If you're going to survive in this business, you're going to have to understand that that's a very small faction of people that are probably unhappy in some way,' she said.
About 'somebody who is going to take the time to make a video just to jump on that thing,' the mother of two — who shares 16-year-old twins Emme and Max Muñiz with her ex-husband, Marc Anthony — said: 'How can I pay attention to that when I have these beautiful kids and all this amazing stuff going on in my life? I can't.'
'Even in hard times, I just go, "You know the truth." Head high. Like they said in Finding Nemo: Keep on swimming."
You can read her full Interview magazine article here. Check out more photos from the shoot below.
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