While JLo and Ben Affleck are busy pulling stunts and shows by meeting up for lunch at the Beverly Hills Hotel over the weekend, Jennifer's first husband is spilling tea regarding what it was like being married to the "Jenny From The Block" singer.
RadarOnline.com can reveal Ojani Noa's marriage to J Lo was "passionate" to the very end, but he said as soon as she got what she wanted, he "wasn't needed".
He claimed: "It was so great, but at the same time so sad because we kind of knew it was the end of the road."
Lopez and her first husband married in 1997, a little over a year after they met, but their marriage only lasted 11 months.
Noa was the only one of the singer's four spouses to have known her before she made it big, and he said he felt like he was an "uncomfortable passenger" during her rise to fame.
He boasted: "I was the first, the pioneer. I was there at the beginning of her career supporting her, dealing with her anxieties and insecurities."
"I was a really good husband because I believe in marriage. When we divorced, I was heartbroken", Noa continued. "I feel when she got what she wanted, I was no longer needed."
Noa told the Daily Mail he put "a lot of time and effort" into their relationship but said they lacked quality time with one another.
In Ojani’s telling, life with one of the world’s most famous women was an emotional juggernaut: no surprise when the star admits her greatest desire is to be loved.
‘But she’s had four good husbands and she’s been loved before,’ he says, ‘so I don’t know how much love she needs or how much love she’s still looking for.’
The death knell, as he sees it, was in part her desire for public attention, after the success of Selena. Whereas before, she could be as irritated as he was by photographers, her attitude changed.
‘I felt she was [now] really enjoying the media attention,’ he says. ‘I would say to her: “You have to be private. You can’t be real in a relationship if you’re always being photographed”.’
Ojani recognises a similar frustration in Ben, who was often photographed looking, he says, ‘like he wants to break someone’s head off.’
In one video clip, which became an internet meme, Ben is filmed holding a car door open for his wife before slamming it shut.
‘I could see myself doing that too,’ says Ojani. Further tensions erupted when J-Lo’s record company encouraged her to be seen in Miami and New York nightclubs with Sean Combs, aka Puff Daddy, who was helping produce a record with her, while Ojani remained in LA, managing the Conga Room nightclub which Jennifer part-owned.
Ojani became increasingly reluctant to maintain the facade that all was well – seemingly like Ben, who was captured at the Grammy’s in 2023 looking bored then annoyed, when apparently being reprimanded by his wife.
Ben later said, despite appearances, he was having a good time and they just didn’t know the cameras were rolling.
For Ojani, again, it brought back memories. ‘In my opinion, they got into some argument [at the Grammys] and then were like: “Oh my God, we got caught”.
‘I can tell you in my own experience, we would have disagreements in the car and then 20 minutes later, we’d have to sit and pretend everything was fine.
‘But you can only pretend so much,’ he says. ‘When we were going through hell and going out as a couple, I was in a bad mood too. Because I knew inside we were not good.
‘I hated going on the red carpet. She would try and get me to come and I’d say: “No way. I’m not going to pretend”.’
Ojani says it was he who called time on their marriage and a few days later says he received the divorce papers. He reportedly received a $50,000 settlement after their split in January 1998.
‘I never looked at another woman when I was with Jennifer,’ says Ojani, ‘But I felt like I was [being seen as] the bad guy.
‘[Her people] wanted to make her look good because of everything that was coming out – the movie, the album, and they didn’t want any bad publicity.
‘They made it sound like I didn’t want to be with her and it was the opposite.’
The fall-out of his marriage bears some similarity to that of Ben’s as friends of the singer have, in recent weeks, publicly branded the actor, ‘selfish, sullen, impossible to please most of the time and negative’.
Ojani, though, praises Ben, saying: ‘I’ve met him and he’s an amazing guy. Even though they’re both in the spotlight, you can tell that he’s a really private man.’
On the other hand, he points out of his ex-wife, ‘she has to like the spotlight for her to stay in it.’
Yet Ojani bears his former wife no ill will. ‘There are no bad feelings at all. I would always be her friend. I sympathise with both of them because divorce is hard.’
Should they ever meet up and romance were to strike again, would he become husband Number Five? ‘No way!’ he laughs.
His advice for Jennifer, though, is heartfelt.
‘Stay single for a while, take 12 months off,’ he says. ‘If she meets someone new, maybe keep it private and not get married again.
She has an amazing career and she’s a hard-working, beautiful woman, but when you’re with someone, you have to spend quality time with them and not think about being on camera.’
He adds: ‘I would just say to Jen: you need to be yourself so you can find yourself.’
The Miami personal trainer and actor/producer arrived in the U.S. illegally when he was 15 and made the 90-mile trip from Cuba to the Florida coast. When he was 22, he worked as a waiter at a local restaurant where he met Lopez when she was 27.
The Cuban immigrant is single and has never remarried.
As previously reported, J Lo is dealing with her fourth divorce with Batman v Superman actor Ben Affleck after they spent their second anniversary on separate coasts.
According to sources, Jennifer "finally pulled the trigger because that was their agreement that she would file, and she was the one who ultimately made the decision".
With no prenup to guide the division of assets, handling high-value properties like their $60 million Beverly Hills mansion has become a critical aspect of the divorce proceedings.
The source explained: "There's really nothing else to divide. One person doesn't want more than the other. They both came in with significant assets of their own."
The divorce between Lopez and Affleck has led to massive speculation surrounding their personal lives.
Rumors have swirled about the 52-year-old actor sparking a romance with Robert F. Kennedy Jr.'s daughter, Kick Kennedy. However, Affleck has reportedly been "desperate" to distance himself from the 36-year-old.
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